So far, Rihanna and her boyfriend Chris Brown have been spotted vacationing together, making out, dropping dollars on jewelry, and cuddling in public. They even have matching tattoos, for chrissake.
Yet Rihanna is still pretending they're just friends. Here's what she said when Sherri Shepherd popped the question on The View:
'We hang out a lot. We are very close. He's an amazing person. But we are not dating.'
Homegirl even denied that they are f*ck buddies. Check out the denial (02:03 mark):
Look. Rihanna.
I understand you wanna keep your private life private, but do ya' have to be insulting about it????
We have feelings too!
Pictures of the closeted couple keeping their distance during a trip to the grocery store yesterday after the jump...
Jack Black was annoying on the red carpet today while attending the one hundred-thousandth film premiere of Kung Fu Panda.
This
one was in London. Add Jack was chock full of annoying, ridiculous
acrobatics that even the 5-year-old kids found 98% annoying, 2% funny.
Notice Jack Black is the only celebrity - out of a cast that includes Angelina Jolie, Dustin Hoffman, Jackie Chan, Seth Rogen and Lucy Liu - who has attended every. single. premiere.
Is
he just trying to torture us? Do people actually find him funny? Does
he just have no life, hobbies, friends, or family to distract him???
I'm starting to believe all the crap Paris Hilton keeps upchucking about her deep love for Benji Madden.
Because when a girl has tasted the flesh
of men like Alex Vaggo, Josh Henderson, and Stavros Niarchos, how else can you explain her attraction to a short, tubby, bald guy????
Yesterday Benji shaved his head, took off his hat, and dressed himself (and his girlfriend) in gothic black in order to attend Crown Nightclub for a night of partying.
Getting stocked up on debauchery before they become boring parents like Nicole and Joel, no doubt.
Actually, these two are already boring. Even childless.
A few weeks after Reese Witherspoon's divorce from Ryan Phillippe became final, Jake Gyllenhaal has pulled off a secret move into Reese's $5 million L.A. home.
And word on the street is that Hollywood's most boring unmarried couple is getting verrrrry serious.
In addition to subbing in for Ryan as surrogate daddy to the
kids, Jake is already considered 'party of the family.'
'Marriage is definitely what they are working toward,' says one Reese insider. Another friend dishes: 'they literally don't want to spend any time away from each other.'
According to another report, Reese has actually purchased a home in Notting Hill just to be close to Jake, who's supposedly filming a movie there. Fashion.ie reports:
'Reese Witherspoon and her two children have
just moved into a £1.9 million house in the cosmopolitan district of
“Notting Hill." The romantic 32-year-old star took a four-month break from work so she can be
closer to Brokeback Mountain actor Jake, who is currently filming in
London.'
For the record, I have no idea what fashion.ie is, so that the London dish could be completely made up. But the point is: Ryan Phillippe is soooo fired.
Reese can try to pull of the whole
Demi Moore/Bruce Willis/Ashton Kutcher union, but until Jake and
Ryan develop a twenty-five year age gap, homeboys are gonna be stepping on each other's toes like two egos in a boxing ring.
Yup. It's over. Pretty soon Ryan's kids will even be calling him 'Uncle Ry.' He should just go start a new family with Abbie Cornish...
Matthew McConaughey's surfing clique became a little un-cool when they jumped a crew of paparazzi last weekend, so the earthy actor has fallen back on more conventional types of outdoor exercise.
Jogging!
Mattie worked up a sweat with his trainer - who is not likely to chuck beers at photographers any time soon - in Malibu yesterday.
Possibly as a tribute to his uber-pregnant girlfriend (who was getting her shop on in nearby Santa Monica), Matthew even strapped on a few extra pounds of weight for his jog.
Meanwhile, somewhere on a Malibu beach, a crowd of surfer bros are scratching their balls heads and wondering why Matt doesn't want to hang out with them anymore. Bummer, dude!
Those 'hunnies' being my boyfriend David's sons Brooklyn and Romeo Beckham, who got treated to a joy ride in daddy's new car yesterday.
Well, the G-rated version of a 'joy ride.' Davey is too responsible to get carried away. He even left the passenger seat empty rather than sticking the kids in his lap or trunk or whatever. And not just cos the paparazzi were watching. Because David is part of a 'normal family.' The superstar soccer player once told the media:
'Whether people believe it or not, we are a normal family and we are
normal with our kids. We don’t spoil them. We make sure they are
brought up the way we were brought up, and the way kids should be
brought up - with respect for people.'
I'm not sure what alternate universe David is living in if he thinks
there's anything 'normal' about having your kids followed by bodyguards
24/7 and transporting them in a $400,000
Rolls-Royce.
Oh wait, that's right - he's now part of the delusional reality that is Hollywood. Compared to the Denise Richards' and Alec Baldwins' of the world, the Beckhams are a modern day version of The Waltons.
Which is why, next time I really need to feel normal, I'm going to visit my schizophrenic aunt at the mental hospital. Nothing like a little contrast to boost the self-esteem.
Audrina Patridge stocked up on some much-needed groping items at a trendy Melrose boutique this week. Accompanied by her
publicist and another entirely overpaid and unnecessary assistant, the Hills star enjoyed every minute of her giddy retail mission.
She took clothes off, she put clothes on. She laughed, she tried to be witty, she blew kisses. Then she gave all the male paparazzi hard-ons by talking about her newly purchased bikinis. Check it out:
Audrina, don't listen to those paparazzi for a second. No way they like you better than Speidi.
Gwen Stefani and Gavin Rossdale took Kingston, the nanny and her giant fetus to the zoo yesterday for a little visit with the elephants.
The animal fun included rendezvousing with Gavin's would-be tennis partnerRoger Federer, merry-go-rounding, Chinese food, and an uber-long walk back to their London
home (to kick-start Gwen's post-pregnancy get-skinny plan).
Oh yeah,
and getting pestered by the paparazzi. Check out Gavin and Gwen stay
mum when asked what they'll name aforementioned fetus after it pops in
August:
