Sep
29
Heather Locklear was arrested on suspicion of driving under the influence of controlled substance in Santa Barbara on Saturday.
The 47-year-old actress was pulled over by Highway Patrol in a wealthy part of town after severalnosy concerned residents reported that she was driving 'erratically.'
When the po po found Heather, she was parked on a state highway blocking a lane, at which point the officer 'determined that she seemed to be under the influence of something.'
Ya think?
After bringing her back to the station and running tests, police determined there was no alcohol involved, but Heather was using either legal or illegal drugs (not that there's much of a difference these days).
The moral of the story here is of course don't pop and drive. Or, more specifically, don't pop and then drive through rich, socially conservative places where the 'neighborly folk' actually notice things like 'a strange man walking through the neighborhood' or 'hoodlums spraying graffiti.'
Oh, one more thing. In case you forgot, Heather was treated back in June at an Arizona rehab center for 'anxiety and depression.' The same thing that Eva Mendes and Kirsten Dunst were treated for this year. Because, clearly, 'anxiety and depression' really are the new code words for 'alcoholism and drug addiction.'
I guess this should help to explain Heather drunkenly flipping gang signs at a Hollywood club right before she checked into rehab?
The 47-year-old actress was pulled over by Highway Patrol in a wealthy part of town after several
When the po po found Heather, she was parked on a state highway blocking a lane, at which point the officer 'determined that she seemed to be under the influence of something.'
Ya think?
After bringing her back to the station and running tests, police determined there was no alcohol involved, but Heather was using either legal or illegal drugs (not that there's much of a difference these days).
The moral of the story here is of course don't pop and drive. Or, more specifically, don't pop and then drive through rich, socially conservative places where the 'neighborly folk' actually notice things like 'a strange man walking through the neighborhood' or 'hoodlums spraying graffiti.'
Oh, one more thing. In case you forgot, Heather was treated back in June at an Arizona rehab center for 'anxiety and depression.' The same thing that Eva Mendes and Kirsten Dunst were treated for this year. Because, clearly, 'anxiety and depression' really are the new code words for 'alcoholism and drug addiction.'
I guess this should help to explain Heather drunkenly flipping gang signs at a Hollywood club right before she checked into rehab?
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